Seperti yang i cakap in the previous entry..last time i couldn't be bother whether my second son born through c-sect again or not..but again after hearing and reading about the powerful mommies out there about their birth stories ..I felt so touched, and their strories were so beautiful and really inspired me a lot.
My experienced of giving birth azryl was not that bad.But i regret i couldn't had immediate bonding after he was born as he was snatched by nurse to clean him.And i was allowed to kiss welcome him for bloody 2 sec!After that i didn't see him anymore as my open stomach need to close back after cut open wide .I was vomiting non-stop due to the anesthetic side effect.And my leg felt numb made me cannot walked tho i tried so many times.I only managed to gathered my last strength during midnite with my urine bag still intact with me .I walked step by step very very slowly to asked the nurse where was my baby.I asked them to pull that urine bag from me.Its so painful u know a tube stuck in your vagina.huhuhu.
I should calmly waited azryl to arrive on his own sweet time.No such thing as overdue.Because baby knew the best.He was instructed By Angel when to come out to see me .But being a new mom with lack knowledge of birthing i allowed for the unnecessary c-sect.When i rewind back the memory i felt so sorry towards azryl.I should gave him the warmest welcome that he should get.Not by the way he was treated at that time.Handled harshly by nurse and doctors.He was purposely got spanked by the doctors to get the best apgar score and his cord aka placenta the tree of life which support his life were immediately cut as soon as he was out from my tummy.I should calm him as the new environment was totally make him felt scared.but i was so helpless with arm and leg stretched open and strap i just could watched him.Bukan tak bersyukur semuanya selamat..but when u have gentle birth ...its between your faith towards GOD and your inner strength alone.U could welcome your baby in the most gentle way as it should be.
This time nobody could interfere my own birth plan..as the mother is the one who should take control.Huhu.I learned a lot from mistakes.This time no unnecessary interventions such as artificial membrane breaks,induce pills,unnecessary c-sect,and i will wait patiently until the little angel want to see me and his cheeky brother .There are some methods to reduce the surge aka contractions..Why must we fear the labor as its the privilege given by God towards us WOMEN.our uterus aka RAhim bersempena dengan nama pemurah-NYA.
This time i also want to make my breastfeeding mission successful.There are no such thing of tak cukup susu and gave up easily by giving him a cow milk unnecessarily.Of course its enough.Its us who didnt believed that rezeki anak telah tersurat semenjak ia berada dalam rahim ibu lagi.Why must we deny it?No other outsider intervention during my confinement days as this time i want to make sure both of my prince were near to me..i want to straighten the bond between abang and adik..and them towards me their mother.I can do it.I believed in myself. :)because i got the most powerful antidote that god god had given me..MY CHILDREN.nothing else matters.